The most important part of AA

I think that a lot of people get wrapped up in the dogma of AA.  I think many people fear the religious undertones.  The "rules" (hey, I never saw any rules, but I know other people see the suggestions as rules). 

Surrender brought me
more acceptance than I'd
ever hoped to have...

But there's one thing that makes AA infinately better than doing it on your own (if you're actually able to do that)...

In my opinion, it's the most important part of AA.

Wanna know what it is?

When character defects smack you in the face

I have a little problem. 

Well, maybe it's not such a little problem... 

Why is it that the right road is
always the hard one?

I have this tendency to be sarcastic and negative.   It's annoying.  Not only to me, but to the people around me.

I've been working on this defect for awhile.  I have been forcing myself to look at things positively.  The Committee is not liking it at all.  At all. 

It's much harder than it sounds.  No.  Really, it is...

Fairs are for tourists.

Whenever one of my boys looks at me and says, "MOM!!! That's not fair!" they know exactly what I'm going to say... "Fairs are for tourists."  (Which is different than what my mom says, which is, "Tell me who told you life was going to be fair... I'll go beat them up...")

Yup... I've got to turn this into a rocket...

As you may have followed, my oldest son is in Cub Scouts.  We built a gorgeous (if I do say so myself...) car.  It was awesome.  Fast and sleek.

And something happened. 

Leaving the rest to chance...

Look, the thing about life is that sometimes a great deal of luck is involved.  (Hey, you say faith... I say luck... Whatever blows your skirt up....)

There are times in your life where you want a specific thing to happen. 

And it's out of your control.

Man, I hate that....

I'm an addict.  Which, by definition, makes me a control freak.

I like being able to control my own life.  When I can't, it's frustrating.

So, what are you supposed to do?  I mean, you can't control everything (no matter how hard you try). 

What do you do while waiting for your luck to kick in?

Well, personally, I do everything that I CAN do.

For example.... I want the owners of a specific house to agree to the deal that I'm offering.  They've said that they're not really interested in this type of deal, but I made the offer and I'm waiting...

So, in the meantime, I'm doing what I can do. 

Today, I went through my living room and purged a large quantity of toys that my kids never play with.  Yesterday, it was my daughter's room and my basement...

Just keep moving forward.  Keep taking the next right step...

And the rest?

Well, I'm leaving it to chance and I'm hoping that things will go the way that I want them to....

You never know.

With just the right amount of luck... It could happen....

Just Keep Coming Back

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Life Lessons from Theodore Geisel

Ok, if you clicked on this going, "Who the hell is Theodore Geisel?" I promise you that you already know who he is. 

No, really, you do. 

Stop shaking your head like that.

Theodore Geisel is better known as Dr. Seuss.

SEE!!!!  Told you so.

I adore Theodore Geisel.  I think he was one of the greatest creative geniuses of our time.  Maybe any time.

Anyway, I was reading my very favorite Dr. Seuss book to my 20 month old daughter tonight and I remembered just how much I love it.  The book is not one of his most famous.  In fact, I don't know that most people have read it.  But they should. 

It's called "Oh, The Places You'll Go!" 

It was the last book published in his lifetime.  And it was published almost 5 months to the day before I got sober.   

So, I read the book for the first time as an adult.  And fell in love with it.

In my own life, I find it every bit as influential as the Big Book in my life.  Sometimes, I think the guidance is even better.

People can't change

Is that true? 

He doesn't really need to change his stripes.
He'd look silly with polka dots, I think.

A leopard can't change its spots.  A tiger can't change his stripes.  (Does anyone else wonder why it's always cats in this analogy?)

But can a person change?

Many people believe that people can change behaviours but not their character. 

I'm not sure that I agree.

I understand the argument, of course.  We even say it in AA.  If you sober up a drunk horse thief, all you get is a sober horse thief. 

So, can people really change?

Are you a victim?

I'm a survivor. 

In more ways than I'd like to count.  I'm survivor of the disease of alcoholism.  I'm a survivor of divorce.  I'm a survivor of heartbreak...

But today I want to talk about surviving abuse.

I'm a survivor of that too.

Of physical abuse.  Of emotional abuse.  Of verbal abuse.  Of sexual abuse.

I think that's harder for me to admit publicly than my addictions.  It's harder for me to admit than the stuff my Committee says to me in my head. 

Yup.  It's even harder to admit than how much damage I've done to myself...

Holding myself down...

Being positive scares the crap out of me.  And I don't scare easily.

It doesn't matter whether it's half full or half empty. 
It only matters what you do with the information.

Look, I may not look like it.  And I know I don't sound like it, but I'm a dyed-in-the-wool optimist in my heart of hearts. 

(Hey.  You.  Stop laughing. You know who you are...I AM an optimist.)

I've also been beat up pretty badly by life from time to time. 

So, I decided a long time ago that I would act more like a pessimist.  Try to concentrate on assuming that the good thing won't happen and then I'm pleasantly surprised when it works out the way I had originally hoped. 

It's a little like being superstitious.  (Which I am... don't ask how I can be superstitious when I don't believe in anything, I don't know the answer.  Just take my word that I'm superstitious.)

Sunday Sweets - Lo Carb Baked Apples

Yeah, yeah... I know it's not Sunday.  But I didn't get a chance to bake on Saturday night (I do have a life you know... No, really.  I do.  I promise...)

So, I'm still doing low carb.  And I wanted a new dessert. These are like apple pie, but without the crust.  They can be made with real sugar for the rest of the world...

Easy, delicious and good for you too...

Low Carb Baked Apples

Leap of Faith.

I think that when most people believe in faith, they're talking about the higher power of their conception or upbringing.  Whether you call it God, Allah, Buddha, karma, the universe or Google.com (hey, don't knock it... Google knows all... sees all...), it's the thing that makes you feel that overwhelming sense of peace. 

Sometimes you've just got to close your eyes and make
a wish...

The thing that makes you believe (against all odds sometimes) that everything's going to work out fine.  I struggle with it.  I struggle with it a lot. 

I don't identify myself as believing in God.  Not really anyway.  Not in the way that I was raised to.  Not in the way that people around me do.  Not in the way that I probably should teach my children to.

Shock and Awe

When I first started writing this blog, I wasn't sure what the reprocussions might be.  I didn't know if anyone would be interested.

We've made it!!! Thank you!!!

I didn't know if I was a good enough writer, an interesting enough writer to capture people's attention. 

But today my blog hit 20,000 page views.

20,000 in less than 5 months.  I could never have hoped to imagine.

And I owe that all to all of you. 

In the immortal words of Sally Fields, "You like me... You really like me!"

Thank you. Thank you.  Thank you.

Just Keep Coming Back

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I only need to get sober for a little while...

I've been through a lot in my life. 

If you haven't noticed that by now, you need to go back and read some more of this blog (plus I love when people read my stuff... It's good for my ego...)

I'm pretty damn hard to shock.  To shock me into laughing is nearly impossible. 

But every once in a great while someone does it.

And it's usually because they're not trying to.  They're being completely serious.  (Wait... I think that means that I'm the one being funny because the funny part is only in my head.  Ahhh, now I feel better...)

I had one of those moments a few days ago. 

Someone I know posted on Facebook that they needed "to get sober for a little while" and that they didn't have a problem with alcohol and that they intended to go right back to drinking every weekend as soon as they were done with their sobriety....

Um... WHA!?!?!

OK. 

Back the truck up baby.  We need to throw that puppy into reverse for just a damn second...

I had to laugh.

After I stopped banging my fists on the floor in hysterical laughter, I tried to figure out what made it so funny (partially because I love to understand why things are funny and partially I wanted to figure out why it bugged me)...

I think I came up with some answers.

It bugs me for several reasons, partially because I can't imagine writing something like that for the world to see...

But even more because if you're drinking so much that you "need" to get sober, you don't need to do it "for a little while".  You just plain need to get sober. 

Really.  No.  REALLY.

Yeah, yeah.  I know.  YOU don't have a drinking problem.

Tip:  People who don't have a drinking problem don't ever feel that they "need" to "get sober".  They certainly don't feel it necessary to tell the world.  And they don't need to protest not once, not twice, but three separate times in the post and related comments that they don't have "a problem". 

[shaking head]

Oh, the world would be so much more reasonable if everyone would just acknowledge that I'm in charge...

But seriously.

I've said it before and I'll say it again...

Nobody gets sober for no reason.  Nobody. 

Nobody gets sober by accident.

Maybe sticking with it wouldn't be such a bad idea.

I really only have one thing that I need to say to this person...

Just Keep Coming Back

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Rock Bottom.

What floor?

As I'm sure you know by now, I take requests if someone wants to hear my views on a specific topic (usually as it relates to addiction and recovery...but hey, I'm equal opportunity... I'll wax poetic on anything if someone really wants me to...)

I asked someone who I've become close to on Twitter if there was a topic that she would like me to write a post on.  She's having a really difficult time getting clean and I want to help her if I can...

Her question was: "Do you know when you've hit bottom?"

It's actually a really interesting question. 

What the fuck is this SOPA thing and why should I care?

You know, it took me a long time and a lot of thought before I decided what to do with my blog today.  I considered shutting it down in solidarity with other Internet sites in protest of H.R. 3261 ("The Stop Online Piracy Act" or SOPA and its Senate brother, "The Protect Intellectual Property Act" or PIPA).

Why?

Well, I'm against the passage of SOPA and PIPA, for one. 

And I, unlike most people who don't really know what it is and what it means, have actually read the damned thing and (based upon the fact that I'm an internet lawyer in real life) am qualified to have an educated opinion of the proposed legislation.

But I try not to mix my lives too much.  However, I thought today might be a good day for it...

Ok, a little background...

There's a big problem on the Internet with people's intellectual property being stolen, passed around, used, sold by people it doesn't belong to, used to make money for unauthorized parties, etc.

The copyright violations on the Internet are HUGE.  And are HUGE business. 

Copyright violation's nothing new.  Not at all.  From the beginning of the history of copyright protection, there have always been problems for content creators protecting their content.

But it's far worse on the Internet.

Part of this has to do with what the Internet is and who created it.  (No, I'm not going to recount the dry facts of Internet history here with you right now.  I'd like you to be awake for the rest of the post.  If you really want to know how it happened, this site has a good overview.)

The Internet (or more accurately "The World Wide Web") was created and organized by a bunch of computer geeks (don't worry, they'd probably agree with me about that classification).  They wanted to be able to have a free exchange of information between all of the computers in the world. 

They wanted to build a platform where all of the computers of the world would be able to share in the vast quantity of information.  They weren't interested in making money.  They were interested in the information. 

And they thought everyone should have free, unrestrained access.

These guys still exist.  All over.  I refer to them as "open sourcers". 

Open source is a methodology or belief that creativity is the best when everyone is freely above board about what's been created, what the building blocks are of that creation and allow other programmers to build on what has already been created.

So, back to the legal problem...

Everyone (except my "open sourcers") agrees that if you create something, you should be able to be the one to profit off of it.  Sounds reasonable.

So, there were various copright laws (I won't bore you with the list) which were superceded by the Digital Millenium Copyright Act (or "DMCA"). 

And I'm not going to go into the provisions of the DMCA either.  You can find it here, if you really want to read it (I advise a strong cup of coffee first).

The part that's really interesting for companies like Wikipedia, Google, Facebook and other "publishers" of content (where they allow other people to post on their platform rather than creating the content themselves) is that the DMCA contains a "safe harbor" provision for publishers of other people's work. 

Basically, if you're a copyright holder and you see your work infringed by some schmo on Facebook, you can contact Facebook through their DMCA policy, provide them the information and the infringing content will be removed. 

Voila!  No problem.

Right?

Wrong.

The lawmakers that proposed this bill felt that the DMCA doesn't do enough to discourage infringement.  That infringers still exist and that they're not being stopped. 

Well, hell.

Google testified in front of the Judiciary Committee of Congress on this bill that they (and I'm paraphrasing from memory, so no nasty notes if I don't get the number exactly right) have delisted more than 5 million pages in the last year for infringement under the DMCA.

5 MILLION.

That's a lot of fucking pages...

So, what's the problem?

Well, there are still a LOT of infringers out there.  Look at Pirate Bay or any of the other torrent sites.  They're outside the US and, therefore, outside of US jurisdiction. 

Also, the other real problem with the Internet is that there's no way to know until you meet the person, whether the person running the website is a businessman in a 3 piece suit or a pimply kid sitting in his basement in the Ukraine with a Dr. Pepper and a laptop. 

Usually the latter.

But I digress.

The problem with SOPA and PIPA is that are overbroad (too over reaching) and I'd be willing to wager that they're no more effective than what we have.  Not to mention that they're the push off of a slippery slope that eats away at the Constitutional right to free speech.  (I also don't think they'll survive a judicial challenge, but that's neither here nor there at the moment.)

SOPA and PIPA give the Attorney General of the United States and private copyright holders the right to order publishers, internet search engines, payment processors and advertisers to stop doing business with foreign companies that are found to have violated US Copyright law.  In fact, they will be required (at least search engines and publishers) to block your access and mine to those sites. 

Other than the fact that it pisses me off because I have a problem with authority, it's a terrible idea.  It's a throw out the baby with the bathwater approach.  Any part of a site that's found to have its substantial purpose be to violate property rights, will cause the whole site to be blacked out.  So, it's not cherry picking the violative content out of the good.  It's just delisting the site altogether.

Second, it creates a situation for companies like Google, Facebook, Wikipedia and others who allow users to post content where they could be required to police all of their pages.  What a nightmare.

Finally, if they fail to do so, they could face suits not only from the Attorney General but from individual rights' holders as well. 

Holding them liable to such an extent can do nothing but stifle the free flow of information and exchange of ideas that makes the Internet what it is today.

But you're not Facebook. 

Why would you care?

I'll tell you why.  Every time the government tells me what I can and can't say, I start to get nervous.  If you don't stand up for what's right at the beginning, history has shown us again and again, they're coming after your rights next...

I don't like the government making laws that limit my freedom of speech and expression.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             

First, how is it anyone's right to tell me what I can and cannot see on the Internet?  That's not what the Internet's about. 

Every time that the government tries to limit my rights, I always think of my very favorite Ben Franklin quote:

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little
temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.

So, I ask you... What are you willing to give up? 

Just Keep Coming Back

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Making the best decision

Look, decisions are tough.  For you.  For me.  For everyone.

Particularly life changing ones.

Who am I to argue with a fortune cookie?

And they're even tougher when you have kids.  When there are a myriad of other people who are going to be impacted by whichever choice you make.

It's easy to not make a decision at all (although that'll eventually catch up with you too...).  Or to make the decision that you think is going to make the most people happy. 

But what I've learned is this...

Anything you can do...

There's a great song from the musical Annie Get Your Gun called, "Anything You Can Do"...

Annie Oakley is trying to prove to her lover and rival Frank Butler that she's just as good as he is (if not better) even though she's a woman. 

Hey, I'm no Annie Oakley, but I feel like I've been doing this number my whole life.  I've been trying to prove that I can do things as well as any man. 

This week reminded me of that.  As I wrote in my post earlier this week, (If at first you don't succeed...) I'm building a Pinewood Derby racer for my son's Cub Scout race on Saturday. 

I promised I'd post pictures when I was done...

Here she is: 

Isn't she pretty?

What do you think???  Damn good job, I'd say... 

Just Keep Coming Back

Endless possibilities

Sky's the limit....

I used to have a paperweight (actually, I'm sure I still have it somewhere...) that said, "What would you do if you knew you could not fail?"

How would you run your life if there were no rules, no responsibilities, no restrictions? 

I know that I find myself holding myself back.  I have somewhat arbitrary rules that I've made up that I find myself needing to live by. 

So, I have to ask myself... What would it take to change?

Days that end with -y

I'm sober.

Ok, that's not going to come as a surprise to most of you... Actually, probably to all of you.  If it is, why are you here? 

Yup, they all end in -y....

And, truthfully, I feel shitty today.

I don't want to write a blog post, I don't want to stay on my diet.  I don't want to go put the trash out on the curb.  I'm just feeling ornery...

Maybe it's the weather (maybe it's the lack of carbs) but I've been cold all day long.  The kind of cold that's way down deep inside that you can't seem to make go away no matter how long the rest of your body is warm. 

Maybe I'm getting sick.  (Though, knowing me, I'd probably refuse to admit it if it were true...)

But here's the thing about being sober....

I do it EVERY day.  Not just on days where I feel good.  Not just on days when there's nothing else to do. 

On every single day that ends with -y.  Holidays, weekends, birthdays, sick days and school holidays too.

Even when I feel like crap.

I remembered that today as I was putting Oreo's that my sons didn't eat during movie night (Sometimes, I'm not sure that they're related to me except for the fact that I was there when they were born...) back in the package. 

I have a huge sugar addiction.

And I could hear the Committee... "C'mon... You've been so good for 2 weeks.  You can have just one Oreo."

Um... No.

And that, my friends, is how you stay sober for 21 years... You don't put the booze (or, in this case, sugar) in your mouth. 

Just Keep Coming Back

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Saying it out loud

What monsters are hiding under your bed?

My sponsor and I had an interesting conversation tonight.  We were talking about the way we work things through in our heads.

And that sometimes, in order to do things that scare us (or to work through things that are emotional for us) we need to say it out loud.

It's like when you're a little kid and you wake up with a nightmare.

You needed to tell your mom about it so that the bad dream goes away.  At least I did. 

I don't have monsters under the bed anymore.  Mostly it's just the ones that I create for myself in my head.

And the monsters aren't boogey men anymore.  They're problems that take on monstrous proportions and inordinate amounts of mental and emotional effort.

It doesn't mean that I'm not going to face the fear.  It doesn't even mean that I'm not going to do the thing that I don't like... It just means that I need to talk about it first.

If at first you don't succeed...

I had no idea what I was going to write for today until last night...  (sadly, not an unusual predicament...)

And something happened, and I tweeted about it (shocking, I know... ) and then I thought about it and decided that it would be a good blog post.

And here we are...

Car #1 RIP

Aren't you glad I cleared that up? [rolling eyes]

As some of you know by now, I'm a single mom.  I have 2 sons (7 and 4) and a daughter (19 months).  They're adorable, but I'm completely unbiased (but that's not the point of this post).

The point of this post revolves around this fact:  My sons are involved in Cub Scouts...

Ok, technically speaking, only my older son is involved in Cub Scouts but the dads that run it feel badly for my younger son and let him dress up like a Scout and be the mascot. 

Oops, sorry...shiny object...

Anyway, those of you who have sons who have been in Scouts will recognize this time of year as Pinewood Derby time.  And it's time for me to build a car. 

Staying sober forever....

Pretty for a fart, isn't it???

I often encounter people who, after finding out that I'm in recovery, wonder aloud if they could stay sober forever. 

They're totally serious, but that thought cracks me up.  I look at them and say, "I don't know if I can stay sober FOREVER either."

Usually they look at me like I just farted out a unicorn... 

They're shocked to find that after this many years, I don't know that. 

But I don't. 

Ch-Ch-Change...

So, I've noticed that I'm doing a bunch of different things in my posts.  I've got a lot going on this year.  I've had a lot of changes happening and lots more to come.

And, because I'm an addict, I HATE change....

Even the good ones. 

That said, I've decided that I'm going to make some changes around here.  You may (or may not) have noticed a new tab at the top of the page.  Please take a moment to familiarize yourself with it now...

It's the new Being Anonymous Forum!  I know... Isn't it neato?  [clapping hands in excitement]

I'm going to be posting all different kinds of topics there.  I'm hoping that I'll get to really interact with y'all.  And that all the fabulous readers of my blog get to interact with each other.

To start discussions... Debate topics... Tell jokes, whatever...  The only thing that I ask is that you be respectful of each other.  Pretty please.  Otherwise, anything goes....

Yes, you can still be anonymous and play...

I know that asking for what you want is important so here goes.... Please come play... 

Just Keep Coming Back

There is no future. There is no past.

Ok, in case you haven't noticed from earlier posts, I'm a HUGE musical theatre (and music in general, now that I think of it...) dork. 

So, if my admission hasn't put me in the category, this certainly will. 

I saw RENT this weekend for the 7th (I think it was the 7th...) time.  Yes, I happen to love the show.  No, I have not seen the same production over and over and over.  I've seen it with the touring company in Miami and West Palm Beach.  I've seen it on London's West End.  I've seen it on Broadway twice and now I've seen it Off Broadway... Ok, I said it already, I'm a dork.

If you haven't seen it, you should.  We actually had front row seats for $25 per ticket (we got pulled in the rush lottery... YAY!!!) so the argument that you can't afford it is silly.

But that's not what I really wanted to talk about in this post.  I wanted to talk about one of the songs from the show.  It's a song that really moves me.  (No, I'm not original in that, it moves a lot of people...) It's called "Another Day". 

Sunday Sweets - Lemon Clouds of Happiness

No, it's not an alien landscape... This is a "stiff peak". 
Hey, you try to take a picture inside a mixing bowl
and see how well it comes out...
When you pull the whisk out and it stays like this, you're there.

I haven't done a Sunday Sweets in awhile... I got overloaded during the holidays and I'm on a low/no carb, low fat jumpstart to losing the thirty pounds that I was talking about in my New Year's Goals.

I came up with this recipe which fits the requirement (since I still wanted a little something sweet).  They're not chocolate chip cookies, mind you, but they're good and sweet and I'm enjoying them...


Lemon Clouds of Happiness

Ingredients:


2 Large Egg Whites -- You can separate your own or you can buy egg whites in the store.  I just separate my own.

1 t (teaspoon) of Vanilla Extract -- (Note: Pure Vanilla Extract has alchohol in it. A LOT. That said, you're using a tiny amount over 8 pieces of pie. You can find fake extract that doesn't have alcohol, but I've found that it doesn't taste quite the same. Even for the 20 years where I didn't eat food with alcohol in it, I made an exception for vanilla extract. But if you're not comfortable with it, use the other, no sweat.)


1/2 t of Lemon Extract -- Same issues as Vanilla Extract above.  You can change this for any kind of extract you like, anise (licorice), raspberry, orange, almond, etc.


2/3 C (cup) of Splenda -- If you're not on a diet, feel free to use sugar.  Don't bother trying Truvia.  I already made that mistake for you.  It tastes like ass...

Hardware:

Oven Thermometer -- If you don't have an oven thermometer (the kind that hangs from your oven rack) go buy one. They cost a couple of bucks and I promise you that your oven isn't actually the temperature that it says it is. It's not so important for cooking, but the correct temperature is essential for baking.

This is the mixer with the balloon whisk
attachment.

Mixer with balloon whisk attachment -- If you don't have one, a regular mixer or even a whisk will do, but it'll take longer.

Large bowl

Measuring cups

Silicone spatula


Teaspoon


Parchment Paper


2 Baking sheets

Instructions:

Preheat the oven to 425 degrees.

Start egg whites all by themselves in the mixer.  Turn the mixer up high.  As they start to get frothy, start adding the Splenda (or sugar) GRADUALLY. 


Keep it going (about 4 minutes) until there are stiff peaks (see picture).  Then, with mixer still going, gradually add vanilla and lemon extracts.  When combined, stop the mixer.

Line both baking sheets with parchment paper.  With a spoon, take heaping spoons of the mixture and put it on the baking sheets.  There should be enough room for the whole recipe to be doled out between two medium sized baking sheets. 

Pop the sheets into the oven and TURN THE OVEN OFF.  Yes, I said "turn the oven off".  Yup, to off.  No.  Really.

Do not open the oven for at least 2 hours.  After 2 hours (or even overnight), you can take out the cookies and enjoy!

To store, place in an airtight container. Store in the fridge.

Hope you enjoy! Happy Weekend!!!

Just Keep Coming Back

If you like what you've read, find a way to follow Being Anonymous... Click on the buttons in the top right corner to follow us on Twitter, "like" our FB Fan page, join our RSS feed... Y'know, whatever works for you.

Finding Serenity...

We talk about it, we joke about it, we spend an awful lot of time chasing it.... Serenity.

In AA, it's the goal.  It's one of the promises.

I hear lots of people talking about it, but I'm not so sure that they even know what they're looking for.  For a long time, I didn't either.

So, what is serenity?

Hmmmm....

It's tough to wrap your head around.

The best way that I can explain it is that it's a feeling of inner peace.  A feeling that all is right in your life... Happy... Contented.

For those who've never experienced it, I describe it like this....It's like the afterglow that you get after great sex with someone you love...

Where you're not thinking of anything else... Where you're happy and sated.... Where you smile, even on the inside...

After the length of time that I've been sober, I'd love to be able to tell you that I live my life serenely. That I experience serenity in every moment of my life...

HA!

Hang on to that dream, baby....

But I do experience serenity.  For moments at a time.  Sometimes a little longer.

And the longer I'm clean and sober.... the longer that I work on getting my insides straight... the more that I do the right thing... the more often that I experience it.

And I love it.

Do you have serenity in your life?

Just Keep Coming Back

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It's the Journey not the Destination...

Which road is more fun looking to you?

Hey, winning is important.  I just want to say that right off. 

I don't know what happened where we all teach our kids that "everyone wins" mentality.  Where everyone gets a trophy or where we play little league games where they don't keep score. 

It doesn't teach our kids how the world really works and it makes it that much harder for them when they actually find out that in the real world someone wins and someone loses.  It's a crushing lesson to learn.

But it isn't everything.

The thing that we need to teach our children (and often ourselves too) is that it really is the journey that's important.  Getting to the destination is secondary. 

How fast or slow you get there is irrelevant.  How much fun did you have along the way?

Think about it in terms of life.  You run around accumulating things, always pushing to the next step.  Always pushing to get to the next phase.  Telling yourself that you'll be happier when you get there.

And while you're doing that, you're missing how much fun you could be having on the journey. 

I am no exception.  But I've decided.  I'm going to start looking for more adventures.  Fun ones (of course)...  I'm going to see how much fun I can have while getting there.  And I'm going to teach my kids how to do it too.  So that they know what's really important....

Because we all reach the same destination in the end. 

It's not the years in your life that count.  It's the life in your years...

Are you having as much fun as you could be?

Just Keep Coming Back

If you like what you've read, find a way to follow Being Anonymous... Click on the buttons in the top right corner to follow us on Twitter, "like" our FB Fan page, join our RSS feed... Y'know, whatever works for you.

If it's important, you'll find a way. If it isn't, you'll find an excuse.

I read the title quote the other day and it set me thinking.  I will turn the world upside down to find a way to do find a way to do the things that I want to do. 

What would YOU attempt to do if you knew you could
not fail???

The things I don't want to do... Not so much.

Even so, I'm always surprised at the amount of excuses that I hear from other people on a daily basis.  I can't believe that some of these people get anything done at all....

I don't know how else to say this, but if you want something badly enough, you will do whatever it takes to get it. 

No matter how hard.

No matter the obstacles in your path.

No matter the nay sayers standing in front of you.

No matter where you have to go.

No matter what sacrifices you have to make.

Whatever it takes.

If you're willing to do whatever it takes, you'll get there.  It's how I've achieved the goals that I've reached in life.

For example, sobriety.   I was willing to go to any length to stay sober.  I walked to meetings.  Rain, heat... whatever it took.  If my sponsor had told me that I needed to do cartwheels down the middle of the sidewalk naked, I'd have done it.

I wanted sobriety that badly.  I was in that much pain.

I have said it before but I faced some serious opposition from old timers when I first walked into the rooms.  I had people tell me that I was too young to get sober.  That I should go out and drink some more.  That I wasn't done yet.

I told them that if they had a problem with me being there that they should find another meeting.

I wanted to stay sober.  I wanted to live.

What do you want?  What are you willing to do to get there?  Or are your excuses holding you back?

Just Keep Coming Back

If you like what you've read, find a way to follow Being Anonymous... Click on the buttons in the top right corner to follow us on Twitter, "like" our FB Fan page, join our RSS feed... Y'know, whatever works for you.

Just because you give up doesn't mean you give it all up...

There's a quote from one of my favorite songs from The Wiz (Don't judge... I was a theatre major) that always makes me think...

"Don't you give up walkin' cause you gave up shoes...."

You know, I think that a lot of addicts worry that their life will be over when they get clean.  That they'll never have fun again (because they're fooling themselves into thinking that they're still having fun).  That the best part of their life is over. 

Too smart?

I have always suspected that people who aren't addicts think that addicts are dumb.  I mean, we got addicted.  How stupid is that?

Here's the thing that they don't understand.

Addicts are some of the smartest people around. 

No.  Really. 

I want my sugar...

As I said in my post last week, I'm going to lose 30 lbs this year.  No, this isn't a diet blog, just keep your panties on...  I'm gonna get to the point, bear with me...

Ah sugar, how I miss you so... Sweet, tasty
sugar...

I gained about 20 lbs in the last few months in large part due to the stress involved with my divorce.  And once I start eating sugar, I can't stop.

You might ask why.  I might have to look at you in amazement and suggest that you read some of this blog then come back and read this post....

I can't stop because I'm an addict. 

The sugar addiction is a large part of my alcohol addiction.  It's the part that I've fought the hardest to overcome.  And after more than 21 years, it still gets me.

Fresh beginnings

You know what I like almost as much as the end of something?  The beginning. 

I love opening a new notebook and writing on the first page.  I love new calendars without stuff in them.  I love being the first person out into the snow.

The unlimited possibilities.

And you know what I love about January 1st?

It's the beginning.