I want my sugar...

As I said in my post last week, I'm going to lose 30 lbs this year.  No, this isn't a diet blog, just keep your panties on...  I'm gonna get to the point, bear with me...

Ah sugar, how I miss you so... Sweet, tasty
sugar...

I gained about 20 lbs in the last few months in large part due to the stress involved with my divorce.  And once I start eating sugar, I can't stop.

You might ask why.  I might have to look at you in amazement and suggest that you read some of this blog then come back and read this post....

I can't stop because I'm an addict. 

The sugar addiction is a large part of my alcohol addiction.  It's the part that I've fought the hardest to overcome.  And after more than 21 years, it still gets me.


I think I've said it before, but if you think about it, the thing that your body is addicted to when you're an alcoholic is sugar.  Alcohol breaks down to sugar in your system.  The physical craving for sugar is overwhelming.  I actually tell pigeons to carry around a chocolate bar with them when they first get sober to help when the cravings get bad.

I don't backslide into drinking.  I don't backslide into drugs...

But the goddamn sugar gets me every time...

And I know that I have to break myself off of the sugar.  Again.  Now.

Just like alcohol. 

Cold turkey.

[whine] I hate cold turkey.  It makes me irritable.  And I'm so much fun to be around when I'm cranky.  Hell, I don't even want to be around me.

But I've done it before.  And I'll do it again. 

For me, it requires that I stay away from all carbs (yes, I know that all food has some carbs but I stay away from as much as possible, particularly refined sugar, fruit sugar, etc.) for at least 2 weeks. 

I can do it.  Like I said, I've done it before.

But it fucking sucks. 

I'm at the end of day 1.  And to say that I'd like some sugar right now would be an understatement.  I'll go back to eating fruits in a couple of weeks, but right now, it'd be counterproductive.

And I know that I'm not at the worst of it.  Days 3-5 truly suck.

But I made it through Day 1.  And that's not nothing.

I had an entire conversation with the Committee this morning about how I could wait until tomorrow to start.  About how it's a holiday and I was away from home and I didn't have anything to eat that would keep me on target with me and how one more day wouldn't make a difference.

Damn Committee....

But I decided that I was going to start this today.  And I did. 

Grrrr....  Cranky.

Today's over... On to day 2...

Just Keep Coming Back

If you like what you've read, find a way to follow Being Anonymous... Click on the buttons in the top right corner to follow us on Twitter, "like" our FB Fan page, join our RSS feed... Y'know, whatever works for you.