Child-like or childish?

Gotta love an enormous teddy!
This is Hugh (short for Huge).
And he is...He's 53" tall...

Here's a thought for you:

There's a huge difference between child-like and childish.

Mull that over for a moment.

Which one are you?

All addicts are terribly immature people.  At least emotionally...

We're childish and self centered.  It's only about us.  About getting the next drink, the next drug, the next fix...  We throw temper tantrums when we don't get our way.  We whine about how we have to use and that you would too if you had our life....

It's often said that emotional growth stops for an addict when they start using.  It stunts your growth right there.  And it holds you there the whole time that you're using.

It's only once you get clean (and the fog begins to lift) that you begin to mature emotionally again. 

I worried when I first got sober that being sober "forever" would mean that I'd be a huge stick in the mud, boring as watching paint dry and that my life was over. 

At 17.

I went to college 6 weeks after I got sober.  (Please note, I hadn't progressed past the whiny part yet...)  I remember thinking, "How am I going to make it through college sober? I'm never going to have any fun.  No one's going to like me.  I'm going to miss all the best parts." 

Like having a friend to hold my hair as I puked after parties.  Like going home with someone and not knowing where I was when I woke up.  Like having people say things to me like, "Do you know what you did last night?"

Oh yeah, I missed out....

Truthfully, I didn't miss any of that stuff.  And I didn't become a bore either. 

I'm fun to be around (if I do say so myself).  I'm still goofy (I randomly break into song... usually ones I make up on the spot.... to entertain my kids).  I still have a sense of wonder.  I still love to make people laugh.  I'm even still fun to go out to parties with.

I still love adventures.  And roller coasters.  And splashing in puddles.  And Halloween....I still get really excited for birthdays.... (Oh, wait, that might be childish rather than child like, but oh well....)

I wouldn't have had any of that if I was still using.

And I haven't had to lose any of my child like qualities just because I no longer act childish (as I did when I was using). 

My life didn't end when I got sober.... It was really just beginning.

Just Keep Coming Back

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